Negotiation is central to business - but how to do it is where parties disagree.

Psychologists suggest that a good way to start is to first seek out areas where you agree, and to acknowledge these communal values and/or interests; then to address the minor disagreements; before attempting to deal with any more major disagreements.

This allows time for some rapport and trust to be built up and means major disagreements are more likely to be dealt with in a more rational and adult manner than would otherwise be the case. Faced with an extremely recalcitrant opposite number across the table, instinct may be to trade verbal insults, but this risks developing into a vicious and escalating cycle - better to hold fire, take the high road and disarm the other party by giving them something they want.

hold fire, take the high road and disarm the other party

Generous opening gestures can break a deadlock. The story goes that in the very difficult Israeli-Egyptian peace talks between Begin and Sadat in the late 1970s little progress had been made. With 13 days of the two-week process gone, Carter presented autographed photos to Begin, personally addressed to each of Begin’s grandchildren.

Here, as elsewhere, the intrusion of interpersonal concerns into the political area reputedly changed the mood and opened the way to move forward and reach agreement. Negotiations reportedly moved on in earnest only after this personal touch.

Presently, a number of companies are faced with the unpleasant task of balancing books in a time of falling orders. Since staff costs are often a major component of total costs, changes to staffing levels often ensue.

Some companies tell staff they are going to be made redundant at the last minute, perhaps partly in an attempt to minimise any unpleasantness between staff and management, or to prevent staff taking company data with them.

Companies with a more self-organising ethos sometimes present the bottom-line figures to workers and ask them what they wish the company to do to balance the books.

Different divisions may take different paths: some cut hours, others lay-off staff early on with a view to avoiding prolonging the pain, others give staff an extended holiday. At Semco, staff have been allowed to use company premises to get other work.

Whatever the outcome, most staff prefer to be consulted and feel better and more respected if they have been included in the negotiation process.

The more Machiavellian amongst us can try using non-verbal communication to assess the progress of negotiations.

When someone feels attracted to us, or agrees with, and is engaged with, what we are saying, they are more likely to mirror our postures and gestures. For example, they might lean in at a very similar angle and cross arms when we do.

Likewise where they disagree, it is common for people to move away slightly at the time the statement is made.

To assess if another party is feeling sympathetic to your line uncross your legs or straighten your glasses and see if the other person moves something themselves immediately after. If they do popular wisdom has it they are either attracted to you or fairly persuaded by your arguments, that or they have an itch. Or that they have studied non-verbal sales 101 too!

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Discover more about the art of negotiation with these Open University Busines School courses:
Managing performance and change
Fundamentals of senior management
Business functions in context

About the author

Jane Henry is an applied psychologist. She chairs the Open University Business School Creativity, Innovation and Change programme.

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