Patrick Kielty is another lovely, easy person to work with - and very funny! I met him for the first time when we pitched up to film him having breakfast in his kitchen on the day of departure. I'd spoken to him a few times on the phone and he'd been great but it's still rather daunting, heading off for a tough week in India with someone you don't know. It must have been worse for him - at least I knew my cameraman and soundman! It's that Comic Relief magic at work. Patrick trusted, I guess, that we would look after him and he in turn did a fantastic job for us. We travelled miles together and some of my favourite moments were filming him and Vijay on our small camera during the long train journey home to Vijay's village. Patrick just chatted away and then mucked around, joking with the project staff as they revealed a rather fantastic Indian takeaway that they had brought with us for our supper. It was so real and so natural and so much fun and - it was all on camera to share with people back home.

It never ceases to amaze me how people like Patrick, Nick and Victoria are so generous to us as film makers… they sit and answer all sorts of questions about how they are feeling - they really put their hearts and souls on the line and let us in. I know that I am just one of hundreds of people that they work with but at the same time I know that we have shared a really extraordinary experience that goes beyond entertainment or glamour to a place where things can never be quite the same again.

A question I am asked over and over is "How do you do it?" - how do you film all this sadness and desperate poverty and keep smiling? I don't know what the answer is. When I am on location all I can think about is the story, the shots, the way the presenter is looking (not hair and make-up, of course, but how he or she is going to come across a few months later on the TV in someone's living room!). I see most things through a monitor which distances me a little; it ensures that I see what the audience will be seeing, giving me a really good steer as to how something looks through a camera and therefore on television. I know that on the plane home from Zambia I suddenly started to cry in the loo - I think it all started to hit home. It also joins up the dots between different shoots - six or more years ago I was filming in Rwanda after the genocide. That was harrowing and the experience has never left me. I remember filming an interview with a lady and hearing about the evening when she heard her husband being shot outside the school where they were hiding. I had no idea how to react. I wanted to cry my eyes out as I heard this story. I forced back the tears - I was feeling terribly confused about whether it was appropriate to cry about someone else's grief when they themselves were so strong. When I came home I went to see a counsellor to ask how I was supposed to react in these situations. She told me how people like Esther will often feel very guilty themselves about burdening someone with the horror of their story, and that to cry with them, to share their sorrow and talk about it is much better all round. I learnt a lot from that. Witnessing (as I think it is called) is something we have to do a lot. We are the interface between the audience at home and someone living on the other side of the world with a completely different life - however we all cry the same tears when we are in pain.

But it's not like that all the time…. at the end of a filming day we have time to chat and relax a bit (when we finish before midnight!). I enjoyed comparing notes with Victoria about Gym Tots and Music with Mummy! My triplets are three years old and her two children are two and five so it was fun to chat about normal things as two mothers. Moments of normality away from the focus of filming are great.

A Mile in Their Shoes is the title of this film. It is being broadcast on Sunday 27th at 6pm. I can't believe that after nearly a year's work it is going to go out - just the once, and then it will be over. If anyone talks during the film I go mad because I know they will miss a line of commentary that we slaved over, or a musical junction that our composer Jonny Gunton created so carefully. If friends admit that they missed it I am devastated (in a cool, calm and casual way) and immediately send them a tape! Seeing Patrick, Victoria and Nick again to record the commentaries has been great. Victoria and her mum, Jackie, were watching the first cut of the film that we hastily put together after coming back from the shoot. A few minutes into the film Jackie nudged me very hard after Victoria said on screen "Me llamo Victoria" as she introduced herself to the little girl, Dinah, she was there to meet. Confused, I translated, "My name is Victoria".
"I know that much, thank you!" said Jackie indignantly, no doubt fresh off a plane from Madrid, "I need a tissue!" She was already in tears.

  < previous   Page 2 of 2